what sex am I?
by spike tashy
Summary: I'm locked in, trapped in a world that thinks I'm sick, that I'm mad. And on some level I think I agree with them. Why else would I feel happier in a dress then I ever have before? Why else whenever I see my reflection do I not see a boy, but a girl?
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

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He's mad, he's always been mad. Those words have echoed through my head since I was a kid. And what can I say. It's true. I am mad, and I'm very happy with it. I can't say for certain when I first realized I was mad. My doctor says I was mad the moment I was born. After all how can I have 1 blue eye and 1 green eye and not be mad? And yet…. If you ask me when it started… I think it started when I was 10. I still remember that day, that exact moment.

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It had been raining for most of the night, and I had just opened the shutters of my room so I could breath in the fresh air. Down in the streets merchants were setting up their stalls to try and sell their wares to unsuspecting buys who didn't know they could get everything cheaper if they just went down to the corner store. I had been about to go back and start my chores when I say it. I can't remember exactly what had happened but next thing I knew I was down on the streets walking towards the merchant whose good had caught my eyes. Stopping in front of the merchant I'm not sure how to act. Then all at once something in me snaps. My hands move on their own as I grab the garment sticking out of the merchant's cart. The moment it's in my hands I start running, flying up the stairs into my room and slamming the door behind me. A moment later the door is bolted and locked, and now I'm alone in my room. Alone in my room with the dress I just stole from the merchant. I lay the dress down on my bed and look at it. It's a simple dress; blue material with white threads holding it all together. My hands are shaking as I shut the shutters so there is no chance anyone can see me, as I strip down to my underwear.

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My heart feels like it's going to explode as I slowly undo the fastenings of the dress. It's with my heart in my throat that I lift the dress of my bed and begin to put it on. The fabric is soft, softer than my normal clothes and certainly softer than my nicest clothes. It fits perfectly, better than anything I've ever worn. Smoothing out any wrinkles that may be on the chest I shakily step away from my bed and in front of the large mirror that hangs from my closet door. A little girl stares back at me, her blue and green eyes stare back at me. I lift my arm and she lifts hers. Slowly I reach up and cover my mouth with my hand. My whole body is shaking. I can't stop staring. I look like a little girl. I look JUST like a little girl.

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That's when it all started. That's when I started leading the double life. During the day I worm my normal clothing and did normal boy things. But at night….. at night as soon as my door was closed and locked for the night I'd change. Change into the little girl I was meant to be. I'd slip into the dress and fluff my now shoulder length ahir, then sneak out through my window and down to the streets. On my shy nights I walk the darkened alleys of paris. On my brave nights I'd walk the streets, looking at the people. I never talked with them though. That was one thing I couldn't do. No matter how hard I tried I was never able to imitate a girl's voice.

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Then…..about 6 months after I'd started, I was found. I had climbing back into my room when I'd heard a knock at the door. My mom was trying to get into my room. I'd thought I had locked the door, no matter how many times I run it through in my head I could swear I locked the door. Yet somehow my mom was able to open the door with no resistance. She stared at me, unable to speak unable to voice the thoughts in her head. And I stood there, unable to move or speak. Frozen in place like ice had been holding me in place. I still remember her face as she backed out of my room and left me alone. That was the first night I didn't hang the dress up. That night I threw it into my closet and did my best to sleep. It did little good. And when I woke the next morning and went downstairs I found 2 men waiting for me. I remember their hands grabbing, lifting my off the ground and hurling me into a gated wagon. I remember the gate slamming shut and someone locking it.

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I never saw the dress again; I never saw my family again. I was taken to the asylum, stuffed into a straight jacket and tossed into a room with only a bed with a thin sheet. 4 times a week a doctor would come into my room and talk. He'd ask me things like; how I'm feeling? Why I wore the dress? Did I think I was a girl? Do I fantasize about men? For 7 years this goes on. My answers don't change, my life doesn't change. I'm locked in, trapped in a world that thinks I'm sick, that I'm mad. And on some level I think I agree with them. Why else would I feel happier in a dress then I ever have before? Why else whenever I see my reflection do I not see a boy, but a girl? For 7 years I live with this…..this…..this limbo of sexes. Boy? Girl? Boy? Girl? BOY? GIRL? Then one night…everything changes.

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><p>AN: WELL FOLKS? WHAT DO YOU THINK? CONTINUE? ABANDON?<p>

LET ME KNOW!


	2. Chapter 2

_I never saw the dress again; I never saw my family again. I was taken to the asylum, stuffed into a straight jacket and tossed into a room with only a bed with a thin sheet. 4 times a week a doctor would come into my room and talk. He'd ask me things like; how I'm feeling? Why I wore the dress? Did I think I was a girl? Do I fantasize about men? For 7 years this goes on. My answers don't change, my life doesn't change. I'm locked in, trapped in a world that thinks I'm sick, that I'm mad. And on some level I think I agree with them. Why else would I feel happier in a dress then I ever have before? Why else whenever I see my reflection do I not see a boy, but a girl? For 7 years I live with this…..this…..this limbo of sexes. Boy? Girl? Boy? Girl? BOY? GIRL? Then one night…everything changes. _

_._

CHAPTER 2

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"HAPPY BIRTH DAY DEAR SANDERS HAPPY BIRTH DAY TO YOU!" all around me the loud echoes bounce of the cold stone walls. As the cake is cut I smile weakly and look around the room. It's full of people. Some I recognize some I don't. off in the corner is mister fubs. He's a nice fellow but a bit odd. He has the fascination with putting a glass of water, or a bottle full of some drink up to his eye and looking through it. Then after a while he'll drink it. He says he's 'drinking the moment.' I tried it once, tasted like normal water to me. Across from his is miss marsh. She's a sweet woman. If it weren't for the number stitched into her straight jacket you'd never know she was a patient here. Come to think of it, why does she need the straight jacket? She never needs it. She's not violent or even mischievous; in fact about the meanest thing she does is smack your hand if you're misbehaving. No one's really sure why she's here. Personally I think it's because her children hate her. They come to visit her around Christmas. They're polite but cold, no emotions on their face. Like visiting her is a chore or a job.

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I'm shaken from my thoughts as a warderly puts a plate of cake down in front of me. "come on sanders. Eat up. Do you know how long it took up to walk down to the bakers and pick this up?" the other warderlies laugh. "maybe he's finally cracked. God knows the doc's been saying it'll happen soon enough. Is that it little sanders? Have you finally snapped? Do you think you're a girl?" again they laugh, but I ignore them. Or at least I try to until one of them grabs my chest about where my nipple is and begins squeezing and pinching it. I bolt up shove the orderly away and yell at him that if he touches me again I'll tear his tongue out. I can feel the eyes of the room watching me as I storm away and sit myself down next to miss marsh who's busy picking something up off the floor. As I sit down she looks over and smiles at me. "hello sanders. How are you? Having fun?" I smile weakly at her. "I'm ok miss marsh." She waves her hand. "Please sanders only strangers call me miss marsh. It's Rowena to you." I smile again. "ok Rowena." She smiles back. "there's a good lad." Off in the distance I can hear the orderly who fondled me laughing. "you'd think I slipped me hand between his legs! Ahahahahahahah oh wait HER legs AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!" I scowl as I feel my fist clench.

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They have no idea what it's like. No idea what if feel to be….trapped in my limbo. Unable to determine if the real me is in fact the real me or if it's some kind of prank played on me by nature. As though she can read my mind Rowena puts a hand over mine. "Don't let them get to you boy. You're beautiful. No matter what sex you wear." I nod but don't smile. In response she hands me a small box. "here, love. Last time my children visited I asked them to buy this at a shop. I hope you like it." I open the box and I can't help but smile. Inside is a small candy. Carmel if I had to guess. I pick the candy up and unwrap it. It is Carmel. The warm taste of the candy makes me smile, and my dark mood vanishes as the tastes travels through my body. "thanks Rowena." She waves her hand. "don't mention it honey. I wish I could have given you more. God knows I….had the money. After all it's not every day a person turns 18." I shake my head. I had been about to ask her how she's doing when mister fubs laughs and says. "it's done brewing. A moment later he downs some of the water in the glass and smiles. After a moment he puts his hand to his chin in a manner that makes it look like he's trying to choose from something on a shelf. "it tastes like… maturity and coming of age." Rowena laughs. "And what pray tell does that tastes like?" mister fubs shrugs. "a bit like coffee. Mixed with chocklate." I smile at that. Trust mister fubs to 'drink the moment'.

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"why do you drink the moments? Why not bottle them and save them for later?" I turn at the new voice, a smile already playing across my face. "hello heckta." Heckta smiles back at me, her face is thin and gaunt, but it holds a kind of youthfulness about it. As though it's refused to mature or age in anyway. Out of all of us she's the only one who's still confined by her straight jacket. I can tell she wants to sit down, so I offer her my seat and place my hand on her shoulders so she won't lose her balance and fall. That would be bad. Blood is her trigger, her own personal demon. Even the tiniest drop of it, sends her into a maddened frenzy. Last time it took 4 warderlies to subdue her long enough to toss her back into her padded room. As I take my seat on the floor she continues. "seems to me like bottling and keeping the memories would be better. Everything else tastes better when you let them ferment and stew." Mister fubs shakes his finger at her. "nonsense. If left for too long the memories mix and mingle, and become like a ball of twine. Sadness mixes with joy, which mixes with anger, which mixes with fear. Would you drink something that is water, ox bile, vitamins and color?" heckta shakes her head. "I suppose not. Not unless someone tipped the glass for me." We all chuckle at that. As the laughter dies down I can hear another warderly speaking in a bit more serious tone. "we'll have to be extra careful tonight. You know how the crazies become on…..her….night." "oh stop you're bellyache-in. You'd think you'd soiled your pants at the very sight of her."

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I'm trying to listen in, but heckta's speaking blocks out the warderlies voices. "that's right. Tonight is her night." I shake my head. "What are you talking about?" heckta looks at me, and I can see fear in her face. Tonight is Alice's night." Again I shake my head. "who's Alice?" Rowena smiles and speaks. "she was a girl who stayed here for a spell. In fact I think you have her old room now." I shiver runs up my spine. "What was she hear for?" mister fubs shrugs and holds the glass up to his eye again as he speaks. "she was insane. Not mad like we all are, but completely insane. Kept going on about, a cat, a hatter, a red queen, and some place called wonderland. She made the drinks tastes bitter, like a lemon, or a poison berry." I nod. "but why is this her night?" heckta laughs. It's a high pitched laugh that makes my spine tingle. But it's Rowena who speaks. "poor dear. Tonight, some 15 years ago, she had some kind of break down. I was in my room at the time, and even though I was 4 halls down I could still hear her shrieking and yelling. Screaming about how she had to get back to wonderland, about how she had to free It from the red queen. The warderlies tried everything, they bound her, gagged her, even tried to drug her. None of it worked, she just went on shrieking and yelling. So they just let her. The sounds she made… you'd think she was fighting her own demons. For the whole night she screamed and fought and made more noise than anyone has ever heard. But when morning came, and the doctors went to check on her; she was fine. As though she's screamed all the crazy out of her system. She was released about a month later."

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I nod, hoping the nervousness I feel doesn't trickling into my voice. "but the way you say it. It sounds like something always happens on this night." Mister fubs nods, still holding the glass to his eye. "something always happens on Alice's night. One year everyone in the building got these torturous headaches. The pain was so much that even the warderlies had to stop what they were doing at wait for them to pass. Another year all the bedpans in the place went missing and another year the clothing for the patients and the warderlies got mixed up; in such a way that the patients wore the warderlies clothes, And the warderlies wore the patient's clothes. What fun what fun." Heckta looks around the room as though looking for evesdroppers then speaks. "some say it's Alice's madness. That all that shrieking and fighting was her forcing it from her body. Now it roams the halls here looking to cause madness." I shudder, not out of fear but out of the knowledge that I live in her old room. I shake my head and busy myself with speaking. "where is she now?" every shakes their head. "she vanished about 5 years ago. She used to come and visit. But then one day…..she just didn't arrive." Heckta chuckles. "perhaps she forgot to remember." I'm about to speak again when one of the warderlies claps his hands together. "ok, folks. Social time is up. Back to your rooms. You've all got 10 minutes till lights out."

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As the crowds begin to break up I smile and offer Heckta my shoulder to lean on. She smiles back and takes my offer. "Thanks sanders." I wave my hand. "don't mention it heckta. Do you need help begging back to your room?" she nods. "yes. The stairs can be difficult to climb when I have no balance." I nod and says goodbye to the others. Walking through the hallways I chat lightly with heckta, how her therapy is going, how she's feeling; nothing to invasive. When we come to the stairs I move behind heckta and place my hands on her shoulders. That way when we each take a step she can lean back on me for balance. A short while later I smile as heckta walks into her room, and turns to me. "thank you sanders." I nod. "you're welcome." I turn and leave making my way back down the staors and heading to my own cell. I'm just passing the nursing station when I hear someone shout my name. "HEY SANDERS!" I turn, the warderlies from before are behind me. The one who gropped me is in the middle and is flanked by 2 others. "come here sanders. We got a present for you." His voice is wrong and it makes me start to run down the hall. In response they start running and soon I feel one of them grab my long hair, and pull. I come crashing down, hitting the floor, and scrambling to get back up. But before I've even got my footing the other 2 warderlies are on me. One grabs my legs while another forces my arms against my back. Even as I struggle I can feel them fitting restraints on me. I do the only thing I can think of; "**HELP!**" a moment later a rag is forced into my mouth and my shout dies down.

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"like we said. We got a gift for you sanders. Come with us and we'll show you." I struggle and fight as they lift me off the ground and begin carrying me. We pass a few others in the hallway but they just see a mad patient being taken to his cell. A short while later the warderlies shove me into a broom closet. A moment later the door clicks shut as one of them forces their way into the closet with me. "you should feel happy sanders. After all you do think you're a girl. This is what girls are used for." I cant fight back as he grabs me and shoves my face against the wall. I feel him tearing my pants down and exposing my skin. I try to fight, try to get away. The warderly just laughs and slams my head against the wall again. The pain is intense more than anything I've ever felt. Tears stain my face and slide down the skin as my torment wears on, and when it's done the warderly leave me sobbing on the floor. My clothes are ripped, my skin is burning, and I've never felt worse in my life. It's like I'm drowning, I can hear sounds, and feel things touching me, but I'm not really aware of them. I hear the door open, some laughing and then another body grabs me and shoves me back against the wall. This time is rougher, and leaves my body feeling like it's on fire. I can hear them laughing as the door opens again, and for the 3rd time someone new joins me in the closet. I fight back as the warderly grabs me. But all I manage to do is knock over several bottles of cleaning supplies. This time the warderly grabs my neck and shoves me head down into the vile smelling liquids that are mixing on the floor.

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I cough and gasp and try not to swallow the foul elixirs, as the warderly uses me. When he finishes with me the door opens again and no one takes his place instead the first warderly laughs at me and kicks me in the stomach. I gasp, sucking down the tainted air of the closet. "well sanders. Now you're a woman. Now wash the stank off and get back to your cell. And don't worry we'll make sure you stay a woman for as long as you're here." I continue to sob as they close the door, and laugh as they walk away and back down the hall. The closet reeks of chemicals, so much so that I cough and gag even as I sob. It probably doesn't help that I swallowed some of the cleaning elixirs while I was being violated. My insides burn as I sit up and I try my best to ignore the feeling of shame that burns in my stomach. My whole body trembles and shakes as I pull my underwear and pants back up. I'm about to stand back up when I see it. As I move my eyes drift down and connect with the watery chemicals that have covered the floor. The light in the closet is low, almost too low to see anything. But there's just enough to see my reflection. Except it's not my reflection stares back at me. The female version of me looks up at me. For a moment I just stare at her. But then she does something she's never done before. She moves on her own.

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I watch stunned and horrified as she stands up and walks out of the closet. As the door closes behind her I feel the while closet begin to shake. From far away I hear what sounds like a train rumbling by, a moment later my hands go to my ears as the train blares its whistle. Then all at once it stops, the shaking, the noise, everything just stops. Trembling I stand up and grab the doorknob. I want out, and I want nothing more than to go back to my cell, and curl up and cry. But when I open the door I realize, things may never be so simple again. The world around me has changed. I'm still in the asylum, but gone are the calming light, replaced by dark red lights that make the walls look like they're drenched in blood closing the closet door behind me I begin to wander the hallway back to where I cell should be. But as I pass a nearby cell I freeze stopped by a mixture of horror and fear. The cell door is wide open, inside I can see a patient I've only ever seen in passing. But it's what's happening that scares me. He's not alone in the cell, he's sitting in the middle of the floor simply rocking back and forth, but all around him little creatures swarm like maggots on a rotting carcass.

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The creatures are small maybe only 3 feet tall, they look vaguely like a picture of a capuchin monkey I saw in a book once. Except that instead of a monkey head, the head of an eagle sits on their shoulders. I nearly jump out of my skin as I feel something brush past me. Unable to move I watch stunned and horrified as another creature walks into the room, holding what looks like a large teapot. But unlike a normal teapot this one has a large gauge on the lid. Still unable to move I can only watch as the creature holds the teapot up, while the other creatures pull the patient down and pin him to the ground. I watch as the creature with the pot bends over and puts the spout of the teapot into the man's ear. A moment later steam begins to roll out of the top of the pot and the gauge begins to move. A second later the creature removes the spout and speaks. "not ready. Needs more time to brew." The other creatures nod and turn to leave the cell only to stop as they catch sight of me. For a full minute we just stare at each other. Then all at once everything descends into chaos.

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><p>AN: WELL FOLKS CHAPTER 2 IS UP AND DONE. I HOPE EVERYONE IS ENJOYING THE STORY SO FAR<p>

OK SO REALLY FAST WHEN I PICTURE HECTA I ALWAYS THINK OF HOW ALICE LOOKED IN THE ASYLUM LEVEL OF 'THE MADNESS RETURNS.'

LOOKING FORWARD TO THE NEXT CHAPTER.

I WOULD LIKE TO PERSONALLY THANK Kmatt23456 FOR BEING THE FIRST REVIEWER OF THIS STORY.

**REVIEWS ARE WANTED AND NEEDED!**


	3. Chapter 3

_The creatures are small maybe only 3 feet tall, they look vaguely like a picture of a capuchin monkey I saw in a book once. Except that instead of a monkey head, the head of an eagle sits on their shoulders. I nearly jump out of my skin as I feel something brush past me. Unable to move I watch stunned and horrified as another creature walks into the room, holding what looks like a large teapot. But unlike a normal teapot this one has a large gauge on the lid. Still unable to move I can only watch as the creature holds the teapot up, while the other creatures pull the patient down and pin him to the ground. I watch as the creature with the pot bends over and puts the spout of the teapot into the man's ear. A moment later steam begins to roll out of the top of the pot and the gauge begins to move. A second later the creature removes the spout and speaks. "not ready. Needs more time to brew." The other creatures nod and turn to leave the cell only to stop as they catch sight of me. For a full minute we just stare at each other. Then all at once everything descends into chaos. _

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CHAPTER 3

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Sanders stood frozen as he stared at the creatures in the room. Then all at once reality snapped back to him. Sanders ran, not just ran charged as fast as his legs would carry him back down the hall in the same direction he had come. Behind him he could hear the creatures following him, and shouting. "CACTH HIM! HE'S NOT YET BEEN TESTED!" sanders charged past rows of open doors, each room filled with more of the creatures who watched him flash by, but luckily didn't join in the chase. Turning a corner sanders felt his legs slide out from under him as his socks skidded on a large puddle of floor polish that covered the floor. Falling face forward sanders slid a few feet before, hitting the wall with his wall. Stars burst in front of his eyes, as he tried to stand and regain his composure. Blinking furiously sanders stumbled and fell on his back. This time as he tried to pick himself up his head was turned down the hallway and he caught a glimpse of the creatures following him. His blood ran cold. The creatures did not run on the ground as he did. No they ran along the walls their hands and feet naturally sticking to the walls and even the ceiling; making them look more like a hoard of insects. Even as he picked himself up and continued running he could hear them screaming and shouting. Turning another corner, sanders felt his spirits soar.

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On the far side of the hallway was one of the dividing door between the various wings of the asylum. Putting everything he had into running, sanders threw himself at the door, wrenched it open and slamming it shut behind him. Even as he continued running he could hear the creatures slamming against the door. Slowing down slightly sanders coughed as he became aware of a rather strong stitch in his chest. Gasping for breath sanders tried to go further but found his legs refused to work. He made it another few feet before dropping to his knees and gasping for air. His heart thundered in his chest, his arms and legs we shaking and behind him he could hear the creatures continuing to pound on the door behind him. Still gasping for breath, sander managed to stagger to his feet and continue onward for a dozen more feet before slumping against the side of one of the cell doors. His lungs burned, his muscles ached and his mind had gone numb from fear. He wasn't sure where he was going, all he knew was he couldn't stay still. He had just rounded another corner when he came to an open cell he recognized. He'd been here only a few minutes ago. But those minutes had felt like hours. It was Heckta's cell, but heckta herself was not there. For a moment he considered going to look for her. But he chose not to. He was in enough trouble as it was. He didn't need to expose himself to more danger by wandering the asylum.

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Closing the cell door behind me I cant help but feel helpless. Those creatures will find me, it wont take them long to figure out the door and when they do I'll only have a few minutes until they catch me and do whatever it is they're planning to do. I look up from the ground as I hear a loud crash echo down the hallway. I don't even have the strength to run, or try to defend myself. I listen as the creatures near me, I close my eyes as I hear the door I closed begin to open. If the end comes I hope it comes fast. I expect to feel pain, or fear. Instead I hear someone speak. "you can open your eyes now." I look up. A girl is standing in the doorway. She's wearing a blue dress with a white apron design on it. Several splatters of what look to be blood cover the front. "you'll catch a cold if you stay down there." I'm not sure how but I manage to climb to my feet. "who…who…..who are you?" the girl smiles and laughs. It makes my skin crawl, it's not a normal laugh. "I'm Alice." Instantly my blood runs cold; as my body reacts on its own. I throw myself against the back wall of the cell. As I do so the girl cocks her head to the side. "what's wrong?" as she speaks she takes a step into the cell. As she does so the door closes behind her as though by some unseen force. I press myself as firmly as I can against the wall. "what's the matter? You look like you've seen a ghost. My doctor used to say a hole in the head gives the troubles more room." My whole body begins to tremble and sweat as I watch her pull out a large knife. "Maybe you need a hole in your he-"

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But her voice dies down as the room shakes and another train whistles off in the distance. The shaking is violent this time as when it clears the girl growls and speaks. "DAMN MOUSE KEEP THE FUCKIN TRAIN ON TRACK!" as if in response the room shakes again. This time the girl puts the knife back into her pocket, turns away from me, and makes her way to the door. As she pushes it open she turns back. "now you stay right here. I've gotta go see why the train is off track. But then I'll be back and we'll see about giving you that hole I mentioned." And with that she vanishes down the hallway. My mind has gone numb. There's no way what I'm seeing can be real. It's all a dream, a very real, very twisted, very sick dream. My whole body shakes as I begin to move without really feeling it. I walk out of the cell and calmly make my way down the hallway. It's all a dream. It's all a dream. I stagger down the now deserted hallways. I encounter no one, no patients, no warderlies, and certainly not those strange creatures or that psycho girl. I stop as I arrive at my cell. The door is closed and I want nothing more than to open it, go inside and go to sleep; or wake up, or whatever will get me out of this nightmare.

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Pushing open the door I freeze. It's not empty. But it's not the stranger creatures or even the girl that's sitting on my bed. It's Heckta who looks up at me and smiles weakly. "hello sanders." Sander nodded and moved to sit down next to her. "hello heckta. What are you doing here?" heckta smiled and jerks her head to the wall across from her. I frown as I find myself looking at something I've never seen before. A large door sits across from me. The door is a large double door style. Dark wood, maybe mahogany or some kind of oak, on top of the dark wood, wrought iron bars give the door a foreboding feeling. At the tips of each iron bar a different face sits. Sad, happy, mad, scared, and embarrassed. Each of the faces stare down at me, in a slightly menacing way. I turn back to heckta who smiles at me and speaks. "cool room sanders. My rooms just got a crappy window. Didn't know you're had a door." I chuckle weakly. "it doesn't normally." Heckta nodded nervously and looked around the room. "so you think this is all a dream?" I nod. "what else can it be?" heckta raises and eyebrow at me. "You're serious? Where do you live?" I roll my eyes. "I'm not mad." Heckta nods. "whatever you say sa-" but she's cut off by the sound of claws scrapping against the door of my cell. I stand up as the door slides open. The creatures are back, each one of them glares at me with eyes that could have been the eyes of the devil himself. Instantly my blood runs cold. As all thoughts about this being a dream vanish from my mind. I react on instinct as I grab heckta pull her to her feet throw myself at the strange door, and open it.

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I know I'd been hearing a train whistle but I never thought I'd see this. On the other side of the door is a large gap and then another train car. Looking back I see Heckta's eyes are wide, but whether with fear or amazement I don't know and don't really care. The gap between the car we're on and the car across from us isn't too big. Jumping the gap, I pull heckta alone with me. Landing on the other side of the gap I take a moment to take in my surroundings. We're on a train that much is obvious but it's beyond the train that's catching my eyes. we're on a large track that seems to be climbing up a large hill. Glancing down I feel my vision swim as I stare at the ground that has to be miles straight down. The tracks we're on is not sitting on anything and seems to be floating in mid air. The sky above me is a dark red almost the same color as the red lights of the asylum. "sanders!" I snap back to reality as I see the creatures from before, in the door we just left. I frantically look around trying to find a way for both me and heckta to escape them. And it's then that my eyes find the joining stake. I remember a few years ago I'd seen a book on trains. The joining stake keeps the cars connected to each other. Unhook the car and it'll slow down until it stops while the rest of the train keeps going. I lung at the stake, and take hold of it. The wind whips my hair in a frenzy, the flimsy materials of my clothes snap and flutter in the wind, my heart is pounding in my ears, and my chest feels like it's going to explode. In my peripheral vision I can see the creatures moving forward trying to grab me.

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I do the only thing I can do. I grip the top of the joining stake and for a fraction of a heartbeat I hesitate. I have no idea what's going on; or what will happen if I pull this stake. I mean I know we'll become separated from the train, but what then? And then one of the creatures grabs at my wrist. Reality snaps back to me as I hear the sound of the stake leaving the mechanisms, each of which are in the shape of large clawed hands with their fingers intertwined. As the stake leaves the mechanisms the car we're on shudders for a moment. I watch half amazed half stunned as the clawed hands release each other's fingers. Again the car shudders and this one is strong enough to make me stumble backwards. I yelp as I fall backwards and trip over heckta who I've left on the ground. As I land on the floor, I can feel the car slowing down. I crawl forward to heckta and grab her shoulders. Her eyes are shut tight and her who face is covered in fear. From my spot on the floor I watch as the car tilts up as though going up a hill. But even as I watch the car is moving slowly and slower, and then for a split moment we're frozen in place; simply floating there, like we're underwater.

.

I scramble forward and grab onto Heckta's straightjacket, and begin fumbling with the buckles that keep her arms bound. I had just managed to get the buckles undone when the whole car lurches and I feel gravity grab us, and begin pulling us down. It starts out as a slow vibration but soon the whole car is shaking and lurching. Staggering to my feet I grab Heckta's arm and pull her as far away as possible from the edge of the car. As my back hits the wall, the whole car shudders and I feel the car floor drop out from under me. Above me the sky is twisting and turning, I catch glimpses of what could be clouds, and off in the distance something that resembles mountains. But each time they're pulled from my sight before I can examine them closer. For how long I'm stuck to the wall I'm unsure of. Somewhere near my leg I can feel a knob of some kind, hopefully a doorknob. Reaching down for it, I close my eyes and turn the knob. I feel a panel behind me open up and for a moment my mind works on instinct, as my hand lashed forward and grabbed Heckta's arm. I hear her scream as we fall backwards into the unknown. A moment later darkness envelops us.

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><p>AN: WELL FOLKS. CHAPTER 3 IS UP AND DONE. SO NOW SANDERS AND HECKTA ARE OFFICALLY IN WONDERLAND. WONDER WHERE THE TRAIN CAR WILL STOP?<p>

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HOPE EVERYONE LIKED IT, AND I HOPE TO GET LOTS OF REVIEWS.


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